Thursday, June 30, 2011

Whoooo areeeee youuuuu?

I've been feeling so lost lately. Just wondering if human beings really are complicated, or if it is just our selves that make things so? What I mean to say is, what's so great about being complicated anyway> I mean sure, we have our myriad of thought processes, our ability to appreciate all forms of aesthetics and all manner of beautiful and non-beautiful things, not to mention or capacity for imaginative and inspirational thoughts as well as critical outlooks towards life but- oh wait... I guess that's precisely what's so great about it. I do suppose that I acknowledge that life is only about uas complicated or as simple as one makes it out to be ... and there are times when i wish I coul make my life as simple as it can be. But then I think about it again and wonder... but why? What's so great about being a simpleton anyway? What's so great about the inability to exercise the very complicated thought processes which makes me... well, me!!! But perhaps that is just another bit of self-existential narcissism coming through. Though, a lt of people would complain - rather they would make the statement that they are complicated and hence cannot be understood - which sounds to me almost like a complete disregard for the complexity of other people's lives. Now I don't know what it is about that but I can't stand that so much. In actual fact i do believe quite to the contrary; that we are all similar in that we are uniquely complicated creatures by nature... well most of us anyway... and that the only differents between the complexity of human beings is the varying degree and form of that complexity itself. I also believe that this happens because we make our lives so and that the worst part of it all is that we can't help it. I mean thinking and processing and making complex equations out of everyday symbolism and itnerractions is so much a part of our lives that it has become almost natural to us. To desist would be like telling a fish to desist flickign its fins to maintain its level of bouyancy in the water, perhaps ... or a butterfly to quit flapping its wings and flying. But then in all of this, I'm not quite sure who or what I definitely wish to be. I suppose on many levels the life of a simpleton can be very appealing - to be without care in the world - but on the other hand not caring is something that is extremely difficult to do once you have experienced things in the world. Arguably even simpletons are complex in themselves and I do believe that to experience the world through the eyes and mind of a human creature is to inevitably compexed. Then again being entirely complex has its downfalls too because there will inexplicably be moments where I exacerbate things by pondering upon my own state of existential existence leading me to ask unsolvable and roundabout questions pertaining to the very state of existence I am doubting in the fist place possibly leading to roundabout and unsolvable explanations quite like the one i have just posted here which still begs to answer the question; "Who am I, Who are you?"

Caterpillar: Who are you? Alice: Why, I hardly know sir. I've changed so much since this morning you see...
Caterpillar: No, I do not C. Explain yourself
Alice: I'm afraid I cannot explain myself, you see, because I am not myself, you know.
Caterpillar: I do not know. Alice: I can't put it anymore clearly, sir. Because it is not clear to me.

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